I believe I am going to de-winterize my special guy this week, and if on Sunday it is 9 deg. and sunny as forecast... go for a little ride.
Even just bombing around the 'hood with no helmet on and being a bad neighbour would be fun.
De-winterizing is the process that starts with my wife reminding me of all the precautions necessary to not get oil on the laneway.
She will probably go so far as to fetch me old blankets etc.
I will then do a sketchy, welfare job of spreading them out, or drop the old oil filter or something along those lines.... and voila !
We have new oil stain on the asphalt .
Oh ...at first I will try the "it was there last year" ploy.
And then she, being an untrustworthy sort of person, will go so far as to examine the spot(s) in detail, and without even an impartial jury of my peers...I will be found guilty.
No hope of appeal.
No last meal.
Doomed to that special death row where my fuck up becomes fodder for family shit -kickings at special occasions.
You know what I am talking about...............
Both sides of the family over..things going well, I am my usual witty and amazing self and "BOOM" !!
I will hear "If you go outside you better wear shoes...Al has spilled oil everywhere....."
or
"What is the matter with your laneway? It looks like it has skin cancer.."
It goes silent....heads shake...everyone will look suitably appalled....
I will look like the puppy who crapped on the carpet.
but I will be secretly laughing on the inside.. because in my heart I know that everything is secondary to
GETTING READY TO RIDE !!!
Note...The above could possibly be a slight exaggeration of what will go down. The author in no way impugns the good character of the aforementioned wife.
( the fine print )
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